So, we, uh… we, uh… we done bad, I think. I think we done bad. It’s early to tell, so I might be wrong… but I think we done bad.
We started the session with a couple of weeks of downtime, during which Mercenary learned to fight with one arm, Parvus got used to being a girl, and I grew lots of mushrooms. Towards the end of the last week, I suddenly felt something in my throat, and when I coughed it up, discovered it was a piece of the strange prism that we’ve had for ages. The strange prism that we have been finding pieces of for ages, and has been absorbing them.
And it turned out that my piece was the final one.
When it absorbed my piece, the prism transformed into a diamond, and the writing upon it was finally complete, and legible. It instructed us to go to the mountains near Phandalin, where we would find the vault it unlocked. Without any other missions from any of our other contacts, and with last week’s druid’s assignment for us still pending, we decided to head out there and check it out. The druid even sent us straight there by teleporting us through a tree, which was a real nice gesture.
And fortuitous. When we arrived, Phandalin was burning. There was a big army of orcs fighting a big army of goblins and hobgoblins, with a trio of prison carts full of townsfolk in the middle of it all. In the sky above, several orcs riding bats swooped about, in a gnarly dogfight with a young dragon. A young green dragon. A young green dragon that three of our party recognised.
Yep, it was Venomfang.
It wasn’t totally clear what was going on, but the orcs were from the same tribe as the ones that killed Airina all that time ago, and Venomfang and the goblins were both fighting them, so presumably were on the same team. That kind of implied that they were all bad guys, which Sildar confirmed to Parvus from one of the carts after she rode right into the middle of everything. So we got to it.
It was a massive fight, but we got through it pretty well. Even Parvus, who was by herself for a big chunk of it, didn’t fare too poorly. A lot of it came down to the orcs and goblins killing each other more than any of us did, and Venomfang not being too particular about whom he breathed poison on. Swathes of orcs and goblins fell because of him.
The highlight of the fight came when we finally faced Venomfang. We were all in the centre of the battlefield, cleaning up the last remaining orcs and goblins, when he landed on a nearby building. Obviously, he only recognised Mercenary and Airina, since I never met him and Parvus has changed somewhat, but it meant Mercenary was able to bait him down (things might have gone differently if he recharged his poison breath – like he had several times already over the course of the battle – but luckily for us, he didn’t). He dropped to the ground to attack her, and she tanked his blows before pulling out her trump card. As Venomfang tried to fly away again, Mercenary took an attack of opportunity, and since she took the Sentinel feat when we levelled up, it meant he was going nowhere.
We made the most of his mistake.
First, I cast a wall of fire – more like a pillar of fire – right beneath him, gambling on Mercenary’s Sentinel keeping him trapped in it for at least a couple of rounds. It worked, and he took two rounds of damage from it, more than any single other spell I could have used. He only took two because he died, but it could easily have been more, making it a killer combo which I’m keen to use more of.
Venomfang died in less than two rounds because, on top of Mercenary hitting him and my wall of fire, Parvus ran in and sliced him, Airina blasted him, and I had a zombie orc that came in as well to do a bit of work. All in all, it was a very thorough, very satisfying, and very affirming kill, considering how close our last encounter with the dragon went to going tits up.
After Venomfang died, we mopped up the remaining orcs and goblins. Three hobgoblins escaped, but considering there must have been seventy or eighty bad guys on the field to start with, I’d call that a net win. We rescued the townsfolk and had them hide in the village inn while we went with Sildar to the mine, which he said more orcs had taken over. We didn’t even pause to take a rest, the fight had gone so well.
Inside the mine, we encountered a goblin that we had met before, at some point, who had since risen in rank to become king. Mercenary let him go, so there’s another loose end that will probably come back to bite us, but we had more pressing matters to attend to. We rescued the first couple of miners, but they said Gundran and his brother were further in, being held captive by the orc chief. We sent the miners on their way to the village before delving further into the mine.
We killed a couple of orcs in the labyrinthine tunnels before entering a room with a pair of orc clerics and a pair of cave bears. That turned out to be a harder fight than expected, simply because our DM threw some killer rolls at us, but we eventually took them down without anyone falling. My use of the amazing spell Healing Spirit in the aftermath ensured that we were all back to full hit points before we continued on our way.
Finally, we came to the main room, where we found the chief, another cleric, and a couple more regular orcs. An attempt at diplomacy was made, but it failed, mostly because the chief was covered in blood and didn’t particularly seem the type that wouldn’t want to fight.
He started the fight by charging Parvus and walloping him for a ton of damage. By this point, our arsenals were all running pretty low, but I had kept a couple of spell slots just for this occasion. I cast Heat Metal on the chief’s chainmail, cooking him like a lobster for a couple of rounds, while on my next turn I dropped a tidal wave on him, the cleric, and two of the regular orcs, both of whom died. The cleric was taken out by Airina, while the chief, being prone, took a ton of damage from Parvus and Mercenary before being finished off by his red hot chainmail. Once he was dead, we finished off the last couple of orcs. Gundran and his brother showed up, having slipped their bonds, and helped us with them, and even my zombie got in on the action. In fact, the only person who didn’t do much was Sildar, who still sucks.
After the fight, Gundran thanked Mercenary and learned about Parvus’ change, and they discussed returning to Phandalin, but we weren’t done yet. At the back of the room, a wall rumbled open to reveal a metal door. I was drawn to it, and as I got close, the diamond key flew out of my hand and opened it. I felt compelled to enter, and though the others wanted a rest, the mine began to shake, so we ended up going straight in.
Inside, we found a chamber filled with glowing mushrooms (which I found super exciting). We also found a couple of bone statues, which, as we watched, grew flesh and armour and turned into people. One was a yellow, pointy-eared chick with a silver sword, who tried to speak to us, but didn’t speak our language, and then fled before the other, bigger one was reformed.
He was a gnarly looking dude with two halves, one angelic and golden, the other pimply and gross. He thanked us and mentioned a reward, but before we could learn any more, we ended the session, because it was late. Those fights lasted a long time.
But yeah, I’m pretty sure he is the big bad, the one we have had several ominous warnings about – along the lines of ‘something big and bad is coming’ – and we just released him. I don’t feel too guilty about that, since I was compelled to do it (I failed a wisdom saving throw and everything). Regardless, we have now officially moved out of the realm of modules and into a homebrew campaign.
I’m a little terrified of what’s coming next week (especially considering next week is Moist’s dreaded fifth session) but it’s also very exciting. Plus, I could be wrong about this dude (doubt it). Maybe he’s just a friendly chap who wants to fill the world with happiness and hugs. Let’s hope so, for everyone’s sake.
And, on a brighter note, with us surviving this session, we have officially outlasted our previous campaign. Our TPK came in session 18 last time, so, yeah, we awesome.